Two Ladies and No Baby: April 2011

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Holidays....ever heard of em?

I recently realized that Kate and I don't really like holidays, unless they are noteworthy, BIG, celebratory holidays. Basically, we LOVE Christmas! Okay, okay we appreciate any holiday where we get a day off. But embracing and celebrating holidays besides Christmas, count us out! Sure.....we enjoy Thanksgiving and the 4th of July, but any other holiday, Nah! New Years: super over rated, Valentines Day: neither one of us is romantic so NOPE, St. Patrick's Day: yuck, it just gives adults an excuse to wear weird stuff like green wigs and face paint, April Fools Day: every teachers nightmare. "You're the worst teacher ever Miss C., APRIL FOOLS!!" The list goes on and on. Well ladies and gents I am here to tell you about an exceptional April Fools Day had by yours truly. I didn't believe it was possible, but I was proved wrong. Here's a fool proof way to ensure a bitchin' April Fools day (pun intended).

I was visiting my brother's family in Kansas City. My brother is a doctor but he is still very much a child at heart. By far one of the funniest/weirdest people I know. I was enjoying the day with him and his family when I started getting all these weird texts and calls about a flat screen TV I was supposedly "giving away." I could not figure out why I was getting these weird calls, so I called my go to gal Ally and the same thing was happening to her. Eventually we figured out that our home teacher had put an ad up on Craigslist saying that one of us had had an awful breakup and we were getting rid of our boyfriend's TV. Ally and I laughed a little about it but mostly we were very confused for a large portion of the day. What a perfect prank to pull on your friends and loved ones, right? Confusing yet hilarious for the person posting the ad. Well Cody and I decided to pay it forward. We put up an ad in Kate's name for a Les Paul guitar for a ridiculous price. Kate's phone turned off because she got so many calls and texts in such a short period of time! NAILED IT! After we laughed until we cried. We decided to continue to pay it forward to my bro Scott in Montana. We put up an ad for his raft and trailer- his most prized possessions. This guy was bombarded by the whole state of Montana inquiring about his ad. Cody and I were dying, I've never had a more hysterical April Fools Day. I guess it's what you make of it, right? Cheers to embracing more holidays. Shabbat Shalom!

For whatever reason I couldn't help but add some weird pics. You're Welcome.

Kidz are the Shiz Carner!

Almost in tears 7 year old boy. "Teacher this morning my brother called me a lesbian. And I'm not."

Just after leaning over a 7 year old girl. "Mmmm your hair smells good Miss. C. what do you use? Garnier?"

8 year old boy stays after school to ask. "So....where do you sign up to be a teacher?"

Playing Simon says I tell the kids to put up their two pointer fingers. Boy in the back row instantly puts up both middle fingers and waits innocently for the next command! Note to self...teach kids what pointer fingers are.

I had just asked a couple kids on the way out what they thought the weather would be tomorrow. One boy was talking about what the weather man said and I said, "I don't know how much the weather man knows." A little girl stayed after class and said, "Teacher I know who knows everything about the weather, Heavenly Father and Jesus." Holla Mormons.

We were talking about voting and the elections this past week and I asked my students if they knew who the President was a few knew it was Bush. Then I asked if anyone knew who was President before Bush one kid raised his hand and said confidently "Abraham Lincoln."

A girl in my class read her journal aloud today. It was all about what her Thanksgiving is going to consist of. At the end she said, "P.S. I'm a veggiterian (veggi-ter-ian)." So naturally I asked if she was going to have turkey she replied with, "Oh yes, I am but just because it's Thanksgiving." She's very passionate about her veggiterianism.

A boy came up to me the other day and said, "Teacher my sister has such bad karma, but I always have good karma." (hello, he's 7 how does he know what karma means?)

Today one of my little ladies came up to me and gave me a hug, then she said, "Teacher you are so skinny, my Mom talks about it all the time!" What the....kids will tell you anything, it's awesome, no filter!

A little girl slapping her butt as she's walking down the hall says, "hey Miss C. look, I have a badonkadonk!" I laughed out loud.

I pulled a little girl out in the hall to talk to her about being a good friend. She says, "I'm trying but it's just so hard."

I had them write about love, these are the two best ones:

"Love is like a smoothy, at first you think I really like this and then you think, what have I gotten myself into."

"When you kiss someone, you just do whatever they do."

"Teacher do you believe in the Easter bunny?" I've never seen him, but I believe in him. "Really teacher? I think in college they should teach you that the Easter bunny is NOT real."

Little boy came up to me in the middle of class to report this piece of info. "Teacher did you know that I ate all of my fresh vegetables?"

"Teacher what's our time limit in the bathroom because when I'm going number 1 and 2 it takes me a long time."