Two Ladies and No Baby: Top 5

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Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Top 5 Reasons We're Glad We Are Two Ladies AND NO BABY

1. Breast Feeding--getting that little tyke to latch on can be such a bother.

2. Gyno--enough said.

3. Don't have to worry about being a bad example-Soda, Cursing, Music, Reality TV, ETC!

4. Romance(with MEN)-never having to beat the kids off in order to get in a good make out sesh

5. The only nap time we have to schedule around is our own.

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Kidz are the Shiz Carner!

Almost in tears 7 year old boy. "Teacher this morning my brother called me a lesbian. And I'm not."

Just after leaning over a 7 year old girl. "Mmmm your hair smells good Miss. C. what do you use? Garnier?"

8 year old boy stays after school to ask. "So....where do you sign up to be a teacher?"

Playing Simon says I tell the kids to put up their two pointer fingers. Boy in the back row instantly puts up both middle fingers and waits innocently for the next command! Note to self...teach kids what pointer fingers are.

I had just asked a couple kids on the way out what they thought the weather would be tomorrow. One boy was talking about what the weather man said and I said, "I don't know how much the weather man knows." A little girl stayed after class and said, "Teacher I know who knows everything about the weather, Heavenly Father and Jesus." Holla Mormons.

We were talking about voting and the elections this past week and I asked my students if they knew who the President was a few knew it was Bush. Then I asked if anyone knew who was President before Bush one kid raised his hand and said confidently "Abraham Lincoln."

A girl in my class read her journal aloud today. It was all about what her Thanksgiving is going to consist of. At the end she said, "P.S. I'm a veggiterian (veggi-ter-ian)." So naturally I asked if she was going to have turkey she replied with, "Oh yes, I am but just because it's Thanksgiving." She's very passionate about her veggiterianism.

A boy came up to me the other day and said, "Teacher my sister has such bad karma, but I always have good karma." (hello, he's 7 how does he know what karma means?)

Today one of my little ladies came up to me and gave me a hug, then she said, "Teacher you are so skinny, my Mom talks about it all the time!" What the....kids will tell you anything, it's awesome, no filter!

A little girl slapping her butt as she's walking down the hall says, "hey Miss C. look, I have a badonkadonk!" I laughed out loud.

I pulled a little girl out in the hall to talk to her about being a good friend. She says, "I'm trying but it's just so hard."

I had them write about love, these are the two best ones:

"Love is like a smoothy, at first you think I really like this and then you think, what have I gotten myself into."

"When you kiss someone, you just do whatever they do."

"Teacher do you believe in the Easter bunny?" I've never seen him, but I believe in him. "Really teacher? I think in college they should teach you that the Easter bunny is NOT real."

Little boy came up to me in the middle of class to report this piece of info. "Teacher did you know that I ate all of my fresh vegetables?"

"Teacher what's our time limit in the bathroom because when I'm going number 1 and 2 it takes me a long time."